Today I am editing this novel line by line and feeling simultaneously excited and frustrated about it. I recently changed the title (so now the acronym is no longer RU but WRBTD) and that feels like a new outfit: shiny and fresh and confidence-boosting.
The frustration is coming from the sheer volume of work ahead. I shouldn’t be surprised. I’ve done this before; I’ve done more than this. But it just feels big and scary.
Days like this I’m grateful to yoga because it’s the clearest reminder that slow and steady really does bring results.
I hit two milestones in my Ashtanga practice last week: for the first time ever I was able to bind in Marichyasana D without any assistance, and I started to make progress doing headstands.
When Michael first started teaching me Marichyasana D back in March he warned me that this was infamous for being the “stopping pose” — that in two years I might find myself still struggling to bind. It was daunting, but I was ready to be patient and to work hard, and now I’m being rewarded for it.
I still find it insane, the amount of change you can make just by doing something every day. The improvement in yoga usually feels infuriatingly slow…until one day I realize that in the span of X days/weeks/months I’ve majorly increased my strength and flexibility.
It’s hard to see the progress from one day to the next. But I just have to keep working.
Outside of my writing and yoga schedule, this month has been just as insane as everyone warned me it would be. (Maybe I was in denial before. Or maybe that was just a coping strategy.) We’re still not done unpacking and organizing things in our apartment. I’m getting married in twelve days. Then we’re flying off to Alaska for our honeymoon. Bodega Magazine is already making arrangements for the next AWP conference. And I’m trying to iron out all my other travel plans for next year. (Surprise surprise, my ulcer has come back. Eating is not so fun right now.)
But overall life is amazing, and I’m so lucky to be able to say that.